So I had a comment in one of the comments section that I wanted to respond to, and I couldn't cram my response into 2500 words. Here is his comment and my reply.
His comment:
Oct 05 2003, 10:55 am
Whoa.
You need to take a chill pill. You are seriously, what is clinically being called, "being an ass".
See, no one wants to tell you how to live your life and no one wants to tell you how to feel or how to cope. It's just that... well... no one wants to be around you when you're not living your life or not coping.
It has nothing to do with 9/11. Looong before 9/11... no one wants to be around someone who is not nice. It's called being happy. You're just mixing ideas around using political reasoning to justify your not too enjoyable behavior.
It's not about being sheep. It's about not being an ass. It's not about conforming. It's about learning social ettiquite. People are not blind, they just choose not to be jaded. No one ever asks you not to do anything... just don't drag us into your sorry ass world if you're having a bad day.
You don't realize it yet but being human means being social. And when you go on huge ass rants like that where you feel like you have the right to be the way you are, just also remember, people who want to lift you up because they're happy also tend to be brought down because you're sad.
And that's when the world becomes a sad place.
It comes with caring. I guess you don't care.
Merle
My response:
"So, not only were you oblivious to EVERYTHING I wrote, you didn't actually read any of it. You thought I was in a bad mood and tore off on a rant for no apparent reason. Sorry sir, but you are the ass here.
People who are happy all the time don't understand the real world. If you honestly believe that being happy all the time will let you go through life well, I wish you the best in your innocence and don't really want to be around you when you crash. And you will crash.
Did you actually read what I posted? Any of it? Or did you get caught up on parts that fit into your very narrow perception of me?
The point of my "rant" as you liked to call it, isn't that the world is bad or good. If you missed that, you missed everything I wrote. Go back and reread it. No. Honestly. I'll wait.
Read it again? See that I'm juggling not just a point against one person, but several seperate threads? See that I'm just reacting, but in fact using it as a jump off point to talk about other things that were bothering me? See that I'm not just talking about what I got from a new age piece of email, but in fact what the entire nation is going through? I choose to talk about this mainly because I look at the world, not just my own life. I believe in being part of the massive social collective and not allowing my own vision to taint that.
I'm a part of the world. I am not THE world. And neither are you.
You want everyone to think like you. Go read your comment again. It's "conform, conform, conform." It's "I'm right, you're wrong." I don't, in all honesty care if you're right or wrong. It doesn't impact me. I'm me, not you. And you, quite frankly, know jack shit about me.
You didn't read the part of my post where I wrote "I am able to make my own decisions. I know who and what in my life to value and why. I am walking a path of my own choosing and while it's not often easy or fun, it is the path I have chosen, and from that I can draw all the strength I need." Strength. Go read that again. Strength. I didn't say the path is a bad one. If you chose to think I was saying that, that's your misstep and not mine.
I'm not "having a bad day." I'm living life. It's not all up and it's not all down either. I never said life was bad. You're trying to read in what you want to see again instead of letting me speak for myself. Stop that.
My point, if you really care to hear it, is that life is about embracing not only your highs but your lows. You need to learn to adapt to all of your life instead of trying to force everything into becoming what you want it to. Because you can't control your entire life. You cannot. If you choose to try, I wish you well, and I'll see you when you break. Closing your eyes and saying all is well is a fool's errand. Am I saying you're doing that? No, but that's what you're suggesting I do with your comment.
I am a social person. You don't know that, of course, because I'm not social with you. I keep in contact with my friends. You should try talking to them and seeing what they say. They'll probably tell you you're talking out of your ass.
Was I a little upset when I wrote that post? Sure. I was one step away from being evicted from my apartment, I had barely eaten anything in three days and I was having trouble handling things. So yeah, the email hit me the wrong way, and I probably over reacted a bit. But I'm entitled to do that from time to time. And I asked forgiveness from the person who it was important to - Liz. You? You apparently didn't even understand my post, so I don't intend to apologize to you.
You think that I don't care? Then you really don't know me. If I didn't care, I wouldn't write at all. I'd go off and live by myself away from people. But I communicate with the world and I share my opinions. They aren't always right, but they aren't always wrong either. In fact, truth be told, they're never right OR wrong -- they're opinions.
I personally think your opinion on this matter is a crock of shit. You think that that people have to be jaded or blissful, and fail to see anything in the middle.
Do you know what I call people who are happy all the time? Drug addicts. They're lost in the blissfulness of oblivion and fail to look around them. Accepting that life isn't all wonderful isn't defeatist. Knowing that you can't be happy all the time doesn't make you jaded. Whether or not you want to admit it, you do learn from pain. You do learn from suffering. You do learn from being challenged. You do learn from taking risks. You do learn from handling situations that don't make you happy.
You could honestly do with listening to a few of the modern philosophers. Go listen to some George Carlin. Go listen to some Bill Hicks. Go listen to Lenny Bruce. Go listen to Richard Pryor. Go listen to John Leguizamo. Go expand your world view.
Being a realist isn't being jaded, and I don't find it a bad place to be. I just choose not to let someone blow sunshine up my ass when I'm struggling to stay afloat. I choose not to let someone tell me that a positive attitude can keep me from losing my apartment, my possessions, my livlihood, my very life. And this doesn't mean I have a bad attitude. I'm still alive and still going, and I feel pretty good about that. I've come through the strife and I've endured. Have my friends helped? You're goddamned right they have. And for that I thank them. But when they're going through something troubling and they don't want help, I respect that. I tend to work with my friends, not against them. I adapt to the good AND the bad. I don't ignore the bad.
You cannot have light without darkness. You cannot have happiness without sadness. You cannot have good without evil. You cannot have glee without having frustration. You can't have one without the other. Otherwise how can you compare it to anything? Talking about this with you, however, often seems like a waste of breath. It's like talking to a religious zealot. "God just IS." Have your faith and your ignorance. If that's what you really want, that is.
Me? I live in the real world. You should come visit it sometime.
~d.
P.S. Don't say I'm talking semantics and not making any real point. I saw that coming before you even read what I wrote this time. *smirk*"
His comment:
Oct 05 2003, 10:55 am
Whoa.
You need to take a chill pill. You are seriously, what is clinically being called, "being an ass".
See, no one wants to tell you how to live your life and no one wants to tell you how to feel or how to cope. It's just that... well... no one wants to be around you when you're not living your life or not coping.
It has nothing to do with 9/11. Looong before 9/11... no one wants to be around someone who is not nice. It's called being happy. You're just mixing ideas around using political reasoning to justify your not too enjoyable behavior.
It's not about being sheep. It's about not being an ass. It's not about conforming. It's about learning social ettiquite. People are not blind, they just choose not to be jaded. No one ever asks you not to do anything... just don't drag us into your sorry ass world if you're having a bad day.
You don't realize it yet but being human means being social. And when you go on huge ass rants like that where you feel like you have the right to be the way you are, just also remember, people who want to lift you up because they're happy also tend to be brought down because you're sad.
And that's when the world becomes a sad place.
It comes with caring. I guess you don't care.
Merle
My response:
"So, not only were you oblivious to EVERYTHING I wrote, you didn't actually read any of it. You thought I was in a bad mood and tore off on a rant for no apparent reason. Sorry sir, but you are the ass here.
People who are happy all the time don't understand the real world. If you honestly believe that being happy all the time will let you go through life well, I wish you the best in your innocence and don't really want to be around you when you crash. And you will crash.
Did you actually read what I posted? Any of it? Or did you get caught up on parts that fit into your very narrow perception of me?
The point of my "rant" as you liked to call it, isn't that the world is bad or good. If you missed that, you missed everything I wrote. Go back and reread it. No. Honestly. I'll wait.
Read it again? See that I'm juggling not just a point against one person, but several seperate threads? See that I'm just reacting, but in fact using it as a jump off point to talk about other things that were bothering me? See that I'm not just talking about what I got from a new age piece of email, but in fact what the entire nation is going through? I choose to talk about this mainly because I look at the world, not just my own life. I believe in being part of the massive social collective and not allowing my own vision to taint that.
I'm a part of the world. I am not THE world. And neither are you.
You want everyone to think like you. Go read your comment again. It's "conform, conform, conform." It's "I'm right, you're wrong." I don't, in all honesty care if you're right or wrong. It doesn't impact me. I'm me, not you. And you, quite frankly, know jack shit about me.
You didn't read the part of my post where I wrote "I am able to make my own decisions. I know who and what in my life to value and why. I am walking a path of my own choosing and while it's not often easy or fun, it is the path I have chosen, and from that I can draw all the strength I need." Strength. Go read that again. Strength. I didn't say the path is a bad one. If you chose to think I was saying that, that's your misstep and not mine.
I'm not "having a bad day." I'm living life. It's not all up and it's not all down either. I never said life was bad. You're trying to read in what you want to see again instead of letting me speak for myself. Stop that.
My point, if you really care to hear it, is that life is about embracing not only your highs but your lows. You need to learn to adapt to all of your life instead of trying to force everything into becoming what you want it to. Because you can't control your entire life. You cannot. If you choose to try, I wish you well, and I'll see you when you break. Closing your eyes and saying all is well is a fool's errand. Am I saying you're doing that? No, but that's what you're suggesting I do with your comment.
I am a social person. You don't know that, of course, because I'm not social with you. I keep in contact with my friends. You should try talking to them and seeing what they say. They'll probably tell you you're talking out of your ass.
Was I a little upset when I wrote that post? Sure. I was one step away from being evicted from my apartment, I had barely eaten anything in three days and I was having trouble handling things. So yeah, the email hit me the wrong way, and I probably over reacted a bit. But I'm entitled to do that from time to time. And I asked forgiveness from the person who it was important to - Liz. You? You apparently didn't even understand my post, so I don't intend to apologize to you.
You think that I don't care? Then you really don't know me. If I didn't care, I wouldn't write at all. I'd go off and live by myself away from people. But I communicate with the world and I share my opinions. They aren't always right, but they aren't always wrong either. In fact, truth be told, they're never right OR wrong -- they're opinions.
I personally think your opinion on this matter is a crock of shit. You think that that people have to be jaded or blissful, and fail to see anything in the middle.
Do you know what I call people who are happy all the time? Drug addicts. They're lost in the blissfulness of oblivion and fail to look around them. Accepting that life isn't all wonderful isn't defeatist. Knowing that you can't be happy all the time doesn't make you jaded. Whether or not you want to admit it, you do learn from pain. You do learn from suffering. You do learn from being challenged. You do learn from taking risks. You do learn from handling situations that don't make you happy.
You could honestly do with listening to a few of the modern philosophers. Go listen to some George Carlin. Go listen to some Bill Hicks. Go listen to Lenny Bruce. Go listen to Richard Pryor. Go listen to John Leguizamo. Go expand your world view.
Being a realist isn't being jaded, and I don't find it a bad place to be. I just choose not to let someone blow sunshine up my ass when I'm struggling to stay afloat. I choose not to let someone tell me that a positive attitude can keep me from losing my apartment, my possessions, my livlihood, my very life. And this doesn't mean I have a bad attitude. I'm still alive and still going, and I feel pretty good about that. I've come through the strife and I've endured. Have my friends helped? You're goddamned right they have. And for that I thank them. But when they're going through something troubling and they don't want help, I respect that. I tend to work with my friends, not against them. I adapt to the good AND the bad. I don't ignore the bad.
You cannot have light without darkness. You cannot have happiness without sadness. You cannot have good without evil. You cannot have glee without having frustration. You can't have one without the other. Otherwise how can you compare it to anything? Talking about this with you, however, often seems like a waste of breath. It's like talking to a religious zealot. "God just IS." Have your faith and your ignorance. If that's what you really want, that is.
Me? I live in the real world. You should come visit it sometime.
~d.
P.S. Don't say I'm talking semantics and not making any real point. I saw that coming before you even read what I wrote this time. *smirk*"
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