Behold! I have uncovered irrefutable proof that Texas is full of morons!

Texas Bill Would Ban Gay Foster Parents

Because, you know, if you like taking it in the butt it means you'd also rape your foster children.

But on the more interesting side of things, Elephants Rampage Through South Korea

Or more importantly, "Three of the pachyderms had barged into a nearby restaurant."

I love how I get a whole article telling me "Animals like to go places other than cages" (which brings out a resounding DUH! I mean seriously, I have a cat. Every day I come home to him bitching at me for not letting him outside), but only ONE NONDESCRIPT SENTANCE that Elephants prefer Pizza over Chinese. I mean really, what's the priority here? Telling me the obvious - Koreans are too lazy to lock cages and Elephants like to leave said cages - or informing me that ELEPHANTS had the following conversation:

"Man, this amusement park is great and all but I'm really getting sick of this roller coaster."
"Totally, this roller coaster is so yesterday."
"Hey! I know guys, Lets go for Pizza!"
"Round Table or Pizza Hut?"
"Round Table has video games!"
"Dude! Totally!"
"Uh, no thanks guys. I'm lactose intolerant. I'm going to the garden instead."
"God damn it Frank, you're such a panzy."

Don't get me wrong, I normally appreciate the news Yahoo.com deems that I need to know, but I'm starting to seriously question their priorities.