Behold, the amazing tale of my survival! Fresh from the first person I told it to (You know, the person who gives me sex):

[09:50] Mav the Evil: HOLY #%#%^@ !@#$@ @# I'M ALIVE!
[09:50] Mav the Evil: *victory dance*
[09:50] MysticDragoness: . ..?
[09:51] Mav the Evil: and before you ask why I say this, I will tell you that today I have seen what oncoming traffic looks like on 50 from the wrong side of the divider
[09:52] MysticDragoness: . . .
[09:52] MysticDragoness: Erm
[09:52] MysticDragoness: What?!
[09:53] Mav the Evil: there was a metallic ladder in the offramp lane at folsom. Because it was metalic finish, and its slightly blue skies but overcast, I didn't see it until I was right up on it... and since this thing comes up to where my wheels meet the bumper, I did not want to hit this. So I swerved left and lost traction as I was trying to correct, and basically over corrected, so now I'm heading torwards the ditch, or starting to, so I swerve left again
[09:53] Mav the Evil: so now I'm looking at an awesome impact with the center divider, I start trying to even out and apply brakes... and its around that time I do a one 80 and start facing the card behind me
[09:53] Mav the Evil: fortunately he was one lane over and was smart enough to slow down and move so we didn't collide
[09:54] MysticDragoness: .... oh god
[09:54] Mav the Evil: and I come to a stop facing the wrong way in the left lane, or what is now the right lane
[09:54] Mav the Evil: and then pull onto the shoulder
[09:54] Mav the Evil: about 4 minutes later there was 3 highway patrol bikes driving by and one of the camaros, which slowed down traffic so I could get off the freeway
[09:55] MysticDragoness: ><
[09:55] MysticDragoness: *hugs tight*
[09:56] MysticDragoness: You scare me. You're not allowed to get in near-death situations anymore
[09:56] Mav the Evil: meep meep
[09:57] Mav the Evil: well near car accident anyways
[09:57] Mav the Evil: I wouldn't have swerved if there was more traffic
[09:57] Mav the Evil: but the road was clear to my left so I took it... I just didn't expect to take up 4 lanes to correct myself
[09:57] Mav the Evil: so basically I've just been trying to figure out what I did right and what I did wrong
[09:58] Mav the Evil: I'm pretty damn sure I did something wrong that I went through that much of a problem just to stop
[09:58] Mav the Evil: but I'm pretty sure I did something right because nothing bad happened to my car
[09:58] MysticDragoness: *hug*

So, in summary, I probably did something just a little too wrong considering the rammifications my first swerve took on my traction with the road, but considering how many idiots crash on 50 daily to lesser things than this, I take comfort in I did a good enough job to stay alive.