I give up... I am my own timezone now.

I can't sleep when I want, I can't get up when I want -- I exist in this semi-surreal quasi-mental state of existance outside of reality. I can't reset my sleep schedule -- tried and failed. I can't try getting less sleep -- it starts to make me sick. I don't have the foggiest idea what to do. I'm trying to just accept the fact that this is the format my body is in right now while I struggle and flail to get work again.

I dunno. Lots of shit on my mind. Lots of shit. Probably nothing, though. Still can't tell, though. Trying very hard right now to just keep my head down and keep moving, keep going, not stop and look around, just keep going towards something, anything.

I don't think I'm depressed, but I dunno what I am. Out of focus, that's how I feel. Nothing seems to make sense at the moment. Is it me? Is it everyone else? Is it life?

thefuck. I'm probably talking out of my ass again. Oh well, time to go lay down and try and force myself to pass out for an hour before I actually sleep....